Dating Apps For People With Stds 4,9/5 8504 votes
PositiveSingles - Best Herpes Dating App
Premium dating app for people with herpes and other STD’s.
App Features
Herpes Blog ▪ Let's Meet ▪ Pattern Lock ▪ Chatroom ▪ Messages ▪ Private album
Positive Singles may be the most complete IOS and Android herpes dating app on the market. With great privacy features and a familiar social media style interface, Positive Singles provides a great place for people with herpes and other common STD’s to hook up and get back into the dating scene. A basic membership is free, but to access most of the best features you will require a membership. Read more »Hope - Never Lose Your Hope on Love
Hope is an alternative STD dating app for singles with herpes and HPV
App Features
Hot list ▪ Speedmatch ▪ Messages ▪ STD Filter ▪ limitless album ▪ FB Login
Hope is another great STD dating app for people living with herpes. This one features a couple of unique features like a Hot List for, you guessed it, highlighting the hottest people using the app, and a matches section for finding great people to meet up with. Perhaps one of the best features of this app is that it’s absolutely free – no fees at all. Read more »MPWH - App to Meet People With Herpes
MPWH is a dating app exclusively for people living with herpes
App Features
Let's Meet ▪ Herpes community ▪ Profile verification ▪ My lists
MPWH is a little different from the other apps in this article as it’s designed exclusively as a dating app for people with herpes, so if you’re living with a different type of STD this site probably isn’t for you. This is another completely free app, although the developers do assert that it will likely include a premium section in the future. It’s got some nice features that are very simple to use, such as the activity section where you can find people that closely match your profile. Read more »Hallo - New Herpes Dating App
The First STD Voice Social Networking and Dating App for Herpes, HPV and HIV Positive Singles.
App Features
Voice chat ▪ Voice Reply ▪ Photo Masks
Hallo its self said it is the first voice social app that caters to a much more specific audience – in this case it's for those living with STDs. This is a disease that's still surrounded by a lot of misunderstanding – it's great to see an app where people living with the disease can find other people facing the same challenges. Read more »Hdate - Herpes & STD Dating App
One of the best herpes dating apps around
App Features
Tinder swipe ▪ Moments ▪ Messages ▪ Hot topics ▪ Vote
Hdate is one of the better dating apps available for people facing the challenge of living with STD’s. It includes little details such as providing a place for ID verification to ensure other users that you’re serious about the app, and it features a unique game style match system that’s a whole lot of fun. There are premium features here so it’s not entirely free, but there’s still a lot you can access in the free portion. Read more »
As someone living with genital herpes for almost two years, I was always a little put off by dating sites specifically for people with STIs. From PositiveSingles to MPWH (Meet People With Herpes), I never understood why living with a benign virus which affects a majority of people should force us to annex ourselves from the general dating population. It was as though I had to quarantine myself because of a Tinder date gone wrong. It didn’t seem fair. After my diagnosis, I never made an account on any of these sites - it depressed me just thinking about it. I met my current partner on OkCupid, a dating site targeted toward the general population, and my HSV+ status was not a dealbreaker for him.
Join for free to meet Herpes and HPV singles for love and friendships! H date site offers Herpes Support, herpes dating, and HPV personals forum for people with Herpes and HPV. You may want to know something about the Genital Herpes. It is a sexually transmitted disease (STD) caused by the herpes simplex viruses type 1 (HSV-1) and types 2 (HSV-2). The No.1 & Original Herpes Dating Site & App for Positive Singles living with Herpes! Free to Join & Meet People with Genital Herpes & Oral Herpes (HSV-1, HSV-2) Now - MPWH.com.
Now, a new dating app called NeatClub is taking these STI+ dating apps to a different, highly disturbing level.
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Described in the App Store as a “dating app with STD verification,” NeatClub looks to put people’s STI status front and center on their dating profiles.
Though the founder, Ashka Shah, alleges that she created the app because of the stigma surrounding STIs, it is hard to ignore some of the obvious consequences of such an app.
The app requires everyone to provide current STI test results and keep their records up to date, which would require submitting new results every four months. Not only does this present a problem under HIPAA (Health Insurance Portability and Accountability Act), which is meant to safeguard one’s medical records and history, but it can also prove to be an unnecessary expense for those without insurance, or whose insurance only covers 1 or 2 STI tests a year. In order to be on the app, one would have to spend money and take time to get frequent STI tests. This is clearly not an option for those who can’t afford it. Additionally, the standard STI panel does not have a very deep scope. For instance, it doesn’t test for herpes. Other problems can also arise around STI testing, which is more prone to error. In these instances, the app would give the false illusion of certainty where none really exists.
The name itself is also problematic. The use of the word “neat” seems to derive from the notion of “cleanliness.' That is to say if you’re STI-free, you’re “clean,' which implies those who are living with an STI are “dirty.” Yet, this is not what the name is meant to mean according to Shah. The name is a reference to cocktails. On the app, one’s STI status is shown with use of an emoji cocktail. People without STIs are portrayed as a neat whiskey. If you have herpes, your profile has a whiskey with a cherry on top. If you have gonorrhea, you’re a whiskey with whipped cream.
However, a whiskey with any garnishes technically isn’t “neat,” as that term means straight-up liquor in bartender speak. So who are the only “neat” people in the “Neat Club”? Yup... those who are STI-free. The app is named after the userbase consisting of members who do not have any recorded STIs. One wonders if the distinction is without a difference.
Then there’s the risk of harassment and abuse which is commonplace online. It is all made potentially worse when your medical history is involved. Don’t get me wrong - I think disclosing one’s STI+ status is incredibly important, but I think it should be done at the discretion of the person living with it. Deciding when the right time is to disclose to a new partner is a personal decision.
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Imagine having your STI status openly available on this app to anyone who comes across your profile. If the app is anything like Tinder, it shows people within a few miles from you, which could potentially mean someone you already know “irl” can see this information. What if it’s an abusive ex? Or a family member? Or a bully from school? Is it really their right to know such personal information? Not to mention the fact that because of how stigmatized STIs are, having one’s status prominently listed could cause less tolerant folks to make snap judgments. If I were to go on the app saying I have herpes, would I have men messaging me assuming I’m “easy” and treating me like a sex object? It invites too many personal questions that are sexual in nature, which I’d rather not discuss with random men I’m speaking to for the first time.
While one might argue that if I don’t like it, I simply should not use it, I would remind them that it is not so trivial. If the app is made popular, then it creates an expectation that if one avoids using it they may, in fact, have an STI. This leaves those in the dating world who have an STI no recourse for protecting their privacy.
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As someone living with an STI who has navigated the dating world with it, I believe this app is a really bad idea. It has the potential for HIPAA violations, abuse, stigmatization, and the spread of false information. It does nothing to make STI testing easier or more affordable for those in lower socioeconomic classes. In fact, the assumption that everyone has the time and money to get tested every four months is pretty classist. It also places undue burden on its users who may not have any of the risk factors for a certain STI.
To those living with an STI and who are struggling to get back in the dating game, know this: you do not need these apps. You are not strange or broken or disgusting because of your status. You’re allowed to be on “regular” dating apps like Tinder and OkCupid. There will be people who won’t judge you because of your STI status and who will be interested in dating you regardless. You don’t have to disclose to everyone, and when you do disclose, it should be when you’re comfortable doing so.
The only true way to break the stigma of STIs is through better, more comprehensive sexual education. Not by requiring everyone to provide “proof” of their status at the get-go.
Top Image via Pixabay
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Rafaella is a graduate of The New School, where she majored in journalism and minored in gender studies. She's passionate about feminism, LGBTQ+ rights, combatting online harassment, and ending herpes stigma. Visit her website: ellagunz.com